In this episode, Cinnamon takes us through a concept that’s as frustrating as it is relatable: foreboding joy. Ever had a moment of real happiness, only to be hit with a gut-punch of worry about when it’s all going to come crashing down? Yeah, that’s what we’re talking about. Dr. Brené Brown coined the term, and Cinnamon’s here to break it down for all the first responders out there who know the dance all too well. For first responders, foreboding joy is almost second nature. You finally get a quiet shift, a thank-you from someone you helped, or even a solid moment with your family—and bam! You’re already bracing for the next big hit. Cinnamon doesn’t sugarcoat it: this constant “waiting to get hit across the head by that proverbial 2x4” isn’t just annoying; it’s exhausting. But here’s the twist—she’s got some ways to help you actually enjoy those moments instead of worrying about when they’ll end.
Cinnamon starts with the survival mode trap, something first responders know all too well. They’re trained to anticipate worst-case scenarios, which is essential for the job, but she challenges us to leave that mentality at the door when we get home. The first step in combatting foreboding joy is self-awareness—catching yourself in the act. If you’re mid-celebration and already thinking about what could go wrong, stop and acknowledge it. Becoming the observer, not the participant, helps break that spiral before it robs the moment. From there, she moves into the power of gratitude practice. According to Cinnamon (and Brené Brown), gratitude is the antidote to foreboding joy. But gratitude doesn’t come naturally when you’re constantly trained to look for threats; it’s a skill, and it takes work. Instead of letting worry ruin your joy, actively focus on what you’re grateful for in that moment. The goal? Enjoy the good moments without shrinking away from the risk of vulnerability.
If you’re a first responder (or just someone who finds it tough to let yourself enjoy the good stuff), this episode is your wake-up call. Life’s short, the job’s tough, and moments of happiness are fleeting. So, when those moments come, go ahead—embrace them. Leave survival mode at the door and let joy be joy, even if it’s just for a minute. Because, let’s face it, life’s too damn short to spend it bracing for the worst. For more resources, head to afterthetonesdrop.com and follow us on social media to stay updated on episodes that tackle the tough stuff.
DISCLAIMER:
After the Tones Drop has been presented and sponsored by Whole House Counseling. After the Tones Drop is for informational purposes only and does not constitute for medical or psychological advice. It is not a substitute for professional health care advice diagnosis or treatment. Please contact a local mental health professional in your area if you are in need of assistance. You can also visit our shows resources page for an abundance of helpful information.
ATTD Music Credits (Music from #Uppbeat):
https://uppbeat.io/t/vens-adams/adventure-is-calling License code: ANJCYVHRMULSNKQR
https://uppbeat.io/t/vens-adams/rise-of-the-hero License code: H4WTAGJZIXZCM8DM
https://uppbeat.io/t/yeti-music/homewardLicense code: KO7FZAIJBAEAJLKE
https://uppbeat.io/t/sonda/the-heart-grows License code: KAID0ITO96GJZAPS
https://uppbeat.io/t/philip-anderson/achievement License code: XZ4PMCKHW94GUR74
https://uppbeat.io/t/tobias-voigt/nexus
License code: MVMDRGHKHTJRABVR
https://uppbeat.io/t/paul-yudin/breakthrough
License code: FYPM3OJF0NQ4OGTE